urghh ... the tears dont stop. but they dont drop either. they just stay. welling up my eyes and making it hard to see every so often. he talks about how he has no one else in the world who he enjoys talking to. the other one tells me im the one thing that cheers him up (and even i didnt work yesterday). she started crying and said she doesnt have the will to live anymore. she was feeling sorry for herself just like we all do. my sitting with her made her laugh. he sat there depressed (just because he was) and i felt guilty for having fun with the others.
i need people im comfortable with. i need people who i owe nothing and who owe me the same. (somehow i dont see the 2 happening together) i need to unload. i need someone who gives a fucking shit. I need to not be continually dragged down by the weight of guilt and fuckedupness thats attached to all interaction with all people.
...sigh ,.... a way out.


fucking screaam!!!

3 Comments:

nacho libre is coming on june 16

By  3rd avenue, at 7:17 PM  

I can empathise :(( feel the same :(((
Sigh!:((

By  Deliciously Alive, at 10:10 AM  

i saw your comment on my old blog. www.scarletletterman.blogspot.com

hahaha.

that was a few years ago.

now i have a new blog...

it used to be funny in the beginning...but then it became too clinical.

www.pinksidney.blogspot.com

you will come see my handiwork...

By  Duck, at 12:54 PM  

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